Tuesday, December 21, 2004

tomorrow is the day

Abby "graduates." She will be officially released from ABA after tomorrow.
I have my last team meeting for her in the morning, then they are having a little ceremony for her at 3pm followed by a holiday party for all the "students." I am so touched by their efforts for her. My mom is coming and her other Granny is too. Jimmy is bringing her some roses, her favorite, (pink, of course). I'll be there too with Sister Beans.
I tell ya'll, I have been so emotional all week. I cannot believe that she is really on her way now. I am so overcome with gratitude and humbled by my Lord's awesome power, grace, and love. When I think back to where we were a year ago I am just amazed. Amazed. She began ABA a shell of a girl. A screaming, self-injurious, terrified little mess in a pink heart shirt. She couldn't really talk. She had some nouns, but that was it. Rare were smiles and hugs and NO kisses period. Now...she is a delight. So smart and affectionate. Talks too much! LOL. I am so proud of her. She has worked very, very hard.
I cannot believe we have climbed this mountain. There will be many more of course, she's not recovered. Yet.
I have to be truthful though. I am pretty scared about what happens now. Maybe not "scared" exactly, but anxious. I know God's got her covered, but I read enough and talk to enough other parents to know that there is sometimes regression and it's scary to think about losing such hard-fought ground. ABA has worked miracles in our lives and I am nervous to leave it behind. I mean we will still use the principles daily, but she will no longer be in a one: one enviornment; protected by the Behavioral Innovations bubble. Where screaming raging fits are so passe, no one even blinks. Where random tics and outbursts are the norm and obsessive behaviors deriguer. I know it's time, but I am still nervous. And happy and sad.
I think I am also still mouring the fact that we are not quite done with ABA yet. One year ago I never thought Beans would be a patient. It is still really difficult thing for me. I just really needed her to be okay. I am also wary of her prognosis. Lori has given a very different perspective as to what we should expect for her. Slow and laborious progress has been projected.
But, I will not dwell on that tonight or tomorrow. Tomorrow, we celebrate!
Hooray for Abby! Preschool here we come!


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