Saturday, June 24, 2006

it's the little things.....

This morning I was talking to Jimmy and out of the blue he told me how much he loved me, praised my wifey-ness, and said he was so happy that I was his for all time.
It was so unexpected and sponteneous. He shared with me something he had never told me before. Some of ya'll maybe familiar with our romance, but for those who aren't...
Jimmy and I dated for six months when we were 20 and 21. One day, he suddenly dumped me to get married! It was such an awful time for me. Talk about taking the wind out of the sails....
Anyway, he married and within two years I married too. The restaurant scene in Austin is pretty small and incestuous, so I heard things about him from time to time, but I was doing my own thing and didn't give him much thought. About four years into his marriage, things between them fell apart. They divorced and he left the country.
In 1998, the chef/owner of the restaurant where we met and worked together, had plans to put a new super-chic restaurant together and called him back to be his sous chef. He also put feelers out for me. My marriage was not going too great and I thought working outside of my husband's and my business might be good for us so I decided to take the job, totally unaware that Jimmy would be a part of the new venture. What a shocker to find him in the kitchen that first day! It was awkward at first, though more for him than for me. I was glad to be working with him and the other guys again. It seemed like old times. At some point, all the kitchen workers were out together after work one night and Jimmy took me aside and finally formally apologized for his behavior years ago. I was glad. It needed to be done, for his sake more than mine by that point.
A year passed, and I decided to leave my then-husband. I told no one at work, except my chef because I needed to make some changes in my work schedule before I took any action. I left my then-husband and about four months later Jimmy asked me out. It was de ja vu all over again. We got pregnant and married in August 2000. What a whirlwind.
Anyway, the reason I shared all that actually does have a point. What he shared with me today was that back in 1998, shortly after we started working together again I ran into him and his roomate out somewhere one night. Apparently after I left he turned to his roomate and said, "Why didn't I stay with Susan? If I had married her I'd be so happy. I'd have everything I want."
He had never told me this story before and after he did today he said, "And you know what? I was right. I am so happy and I have everything I want."
Thanks for letting me share this little love interlude. I was so touched by his revelation and affection. I am telling ya'll about it for a couple of reasons. Firstly, because it was so sweet and I wanted to brag on him a little bit. And secondly, to maybe encourage someone who might have a dh or SO who is pretty reserved. Keep at your relationship, strive to do the next right thing rather than sucumbing to the temptation to go into retaliation mode. You never know what he's got cooking and when the day comes that he lets you in or lets some of that slow-cooked love out, everything else that has happened before falls away.
Stay the course. The payday is so worth it.

Submit to God and be at peace with him; in this way prosperity will come to you.
Accept instruction from his mouth and lay up his words in your heart.
If you return to the Almighty, you will be restored.
Job 22:21-23
  • International Day of Prayer for Autism & Asperger's Syndrome